It’s an age-old dilemma for any self-respecting pirate. A monkey or a parrot?
Clearly, you can’t have both. They hate each other and there would fur and feathers flying everywhere.
A monkey sidekick has two clear advantages – thumbs. Also a monkey is inherently sneaky, steals keys to get you out of the clink, will sample dates for poison, and is a pretty good judge of character.
A parrot, on the other hand, can talk. It can fly ahead and let you know where the other guys buried the treasure. It can eavesdrop and tell you the whole plot. A parrot can boost your self-esteem and tell you jokes. And it can relay your navigational orders to the First Mate in case the cabin boy falls overboard.
For these reasons and more, Darnit’s parrot is a member of the crew. While the monkey stays at home and eats bonbons.
The Nitty Gritty
Just like the oatmeal bowl, but significantly larger. These bowls are terrific for soup, stew, cereal, salads, huge servings of ice cream, and will do a fine job as a single-hedgehog hot tub. Caution: do not leave young hedgehogs unattended in the hot tub. Do not let hedgehogs (of any age) drink whiskey in the hot tub. Do not accidentally put soup in the hot tub while occupied by hedgehog.
Our darn soup bowls are handmade and are approximately 6 inches wide by 2.5 inches tall. They stack nicely and have a lovely little foot.
All Darn Pottery is either hand built or individually hand thrown on the potters wheel, by little hedgehogs, with locally sourced clay. Our pieces are finished with lead-free, non toxic glazes made right here in our studio in the beautiful Blue Ridge. Our tableware is bright and durable, fired three separate times to temperatures exceeding 2000 degrees. It also feels really good in your hands, with sturdy handles on mugs, terrific balance in plates, good stackability in bowls, and sturdy edges all around. This is not your grandma’s fine china. This is your own darn china.
Every piece is individually made and painted and may therefore look a little different. The minor variations in height, width, and illustration are entirely the hedgehogs’ fault. A lot depends on how much they’ve eaten that morning and the proximity of the next meal. All of the colors look great together and make your table look really happy.
You should also know that our pottery is made without any lead, cadmium, asbestos, anchovies, pink slime or any other yucky stuff. It’s perfectly food safe. Also, our farm has solar power. And bears.
Darn Pottery does not mind being dishwashed because it is decorated with glaze that has been fired into the piece itself. It’s not sublimation and it’s not coming off. Just stack gently and don’t let the critters have a party in there. We do not recommend microwaving as the pieces may get pretty hot. Darn Pottery is not for cooktop or oven use. Do not use to freeze food or drinks. Use a Mason jar instead. Basically, avoid extreme temperature changes. The same goes for the pots.
And now for something completely different...