“My bicycle’s been drinking. My neck tie is asleep. And I’m going to squish that silly bird if he won’t move off the street.” Foxy Finneas hummed completely off key as his bicycle karoomed downhill.
“Whoa, bird!” he shouted as the grouse came back into soft focus.
“Geddouda the street, I tell you. Youzhust cruisin for a bruisin standing here like zis. In the middle.” He stopped the bike and leaned on his right hind leg.
Grouse made a face. “You the new delivery guy?” he snapped.
Something clicked for Finneas and an instinct made him salute the bird. “Yessir, Ale on Wheels, atchur service”.
“Road’s a bit ruff back there. Hazduh take a detour.”
“Well, follow me then. I doubt you’ll be getting a tip though.” With that, the grouse scuttled into the weeds on side of the road, his red cap barely visible.
Finneas sighed and pedaled after him.
The Nitty Gritty
The word “mug” can be traced to early 16th century (originally Scots and northern English, denoting an earthenware bowl). It likely comes from the early hedgehog term “muggetub” which loosely translates to “plunge bath” or “hot tubbe” in Olde English. An extraordinarily tidy animal, hedgehogs of Scotland enjoyed combining their daily ablutions with daily whiskey, frequently resulting in what is today referred to as the Hot Toddy.
Our darn mugs are handmade and are approximately 3 inches wide by 4.5 to 5 inches tall. They generally hold about 16 ounces.
All Darn Pottery is either hand built or individually hand thrown on the potters wheel, by little hedgehogs, with locally sourced clay. Our pieces are finished with lead-free, non toxic glazes made right here in our studio in the beautiful Blue Ridge. Our tableware is bright and durable, fired three separate times to temperatures exceeding 2000 degrees. It also feels really good in your hands, with sturdy handles on mugs, terrific balance in plates, good stackability in bowls, and sturdy edges all around. This is not your grandma’s fine china. This is your own darn china.
Every piece is individually made and painted and may therefore look a little different. The minor variations in height, width, and illustration are entirely the hedgehogs’ fault. A lot depends on how much they’ve eaten that morning and the proximity of the next meal. All of the colors look great together and make your table look really happy.
You should also know that our pottery is made without any lead, cadmium, asbestos, anchovies, pink slime or any other yucky stuff. It’s perfectly food safe. Also, our farm has solar power. And bears.
Darn Pottery does not mind being dishwashed because it is decorated with glaze that has been fired into the piece itself. It’s not sublimation and it’s not coming off. Just stack gently and don’t let the critters have a party in there. We do not recommend microwaving as the pieces may get pretty hot. Darn Pottery is not for cooktop or oven use. Do not use to freeze food or drinks. Use a Mason jar instead. Basically, avoid extreme temperature changes. The same goes for the pots.