Shipwrecked Tumbler

Mission: compromised

$28.00

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The Story

After he landed and took stock, the situation appeared tolerable. The pirate camp was on the other side of the island and they were unlikely to bother him if he kept quiet. Tunafish were fairly leaping out of the water onto the beach, so food wouldn’t be a problem. But what to do about the note? His mission was to deliver it into the hands of Dona Juliana on the mainland – which he could just see when the mist parted. But how to get there?

When Don Gato had been blown off course by the nighttime gales, he had all but resigned himself to Davy Jones’ locker. This island had saved his life.

Nevertheless, his mission had been compromised.

The Nitty Gritty

Early tumblers actually tumbled. Originally, the term referred to a type of cup with a round bottom –when placed on a table, these cups would roll — or tumble. We also know there were other types of medieval drinking vessels, such as the drinking horn, that would roll when placed on the table, spilling mead, beer, or wine (water, juice, and milk had not been discovered yet). Why on earth these old timey people would tolerate such nonsense, we simply cannot say. We do know that hedgehog engineers took a special pleasure in inventing a machine they called The Flattener, which, among other things, performed its eponymous function on the bottoms of tumblers, rendering them stable so no more wine would be wasted.

Our darn tumblers are handmade and are approximately 3 inches wide by 4.5 inches tall. They generally hold about 14 ounces.

The Goods

All Darn Pottery is either hand built or individually hand thrown on the potters wheel, by little hedgehogs, with locally sourced clay. Our pieces are finished with lead-free, non toxic glazes made right here in our studio in the beautiful Blue Ridge. Our tableware is bright and durable, fired three separate times to temperatures exceeding 2000 degrees. It also feels really good in your hands, with sturdy handles on mugs, terrific balance in plates, good stackability in bowls, and sturdy edges all around. This is not your grandma’s fine china. This is your own darn china.

Every piece is individually made and painted and may therefore look a little different. The minor variations in height, width, and illustration are entirely the hedgehogs’ fault. A lot depends on how much they’ve eaten that morning and the proximity of the next meal. All of the colors look great together and make your table look really happy.

You should also know that our pottery is made without any lead, cadmium, asbestos, anchovies, pink slime or any other yucky stuff. It’s perfectly food safe. Also, our farm has solar power. And bears.

Darn Pottery does not mind being dishwashed because it is decorated with glaze that has been fired into the piece itself. It’s not sublimation and it’s not coming off. Just stack gently and don’t let the critters have a party in there. We do not recommend microwaving as the pieces may get pretty hot. Darn Pottery is not for cooktop or oven use. Do not use to freeze food or drinks. Use a Mason jar instead. Basically, avoid extreme temperature changes. The same goes for the pots.

Section divider doodle of old fashioned suitcase

And now for something completely different...

Section divider doodle of baby hedgeghog

Hedgehogs love compliments...

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